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07 outubro 2009 

13 dias (revista de postas)

«Dear Ian and Dominic Higgins (directors),

I am incandescent with indignation after watching the trailer of your movie “The 13th day“, scheduled for release the 13th October. It shamelessly portrays the three young Portuguese sheperds, witnesses to the appearances of Our Lady of Fatima, in the most respectful way. Without the vaguest hint of heresy, this non-sacrilegious depiction can only shock the decent critic. The Vatican has not issued an appeal to boycott your movie, and that alone should shame you. Worse, it has got positive reviews in the Catholic media. What next, praise by João Távora?

In addition, your claims to have extensively researched the story and your apparent will to portray it truthfully cause me great concern. This quaint insistence with sticking merely to the facts can lead to nothing good. You should know that Lucia’s ill kept secrets have bored and disappointed generations of innocent Portuguese children in Sunday schools across our great nation; I can only imagine the deep psychological scars they will cause in the collective minds of the international audiences, in the unlikely event that they remain awake.

I urge you to make up a few juicier little secrets, cast Soraia Chaves as the teenage Lucia and include a car chase or two. Maybe three. I demand that you cease your attempts to promote good Christian behaviour and to bore audiences immediately, if not before. Until then, I shall call for the boycott of your movie.

Yours with concern,

Morgada de V.


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